Douchepocalypse Now

Breaking News...sort of

There is apparently a major war brewing between Abercrombie & Fitch, who is second only to Ed Hardy in clothing related douchiness, and the cast from MTV's Jersey Shore, notably Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino who is second to none in overall douchiness.

Abercrombie & Fitch is offering an amount of money described as "a substantial payment" to "The Situation" so that he will stop wearing their "clothes". They also extended the same offer to the rest of the cast.

Bring on the quotes:

Teen apparel retailer Abercrombie & Fitch Co. is offering to pay Michael “The Situation” Sorrentino not to wear its merchandise.

The New Albany, Ohio company released a statement Tuesday evening titled “A Win-Win Situation,” in which it stated a “deep concern” over the association between Mr. Sorrentino and the brand. A&F offered up a “substantial payment” to Mr. Sorrentino “to wear an alternate brand.”
WSJ

Let's recap shall we?
Jeffery Dahmer murdered and ate 17 people all while wearing a pair of flat front khakis from Dockers (probably) and they never offered to pay him to not wear their clothing. Am I saying the cast from Jersey Shore is more reprehensible than one of America's most infamous and deranged serial killers?

Yes. Yes I am.